Everyone wants to fuck him, everyone wants him to write another novel and everyone wants to find out what kind of information he’s uncovering in his highly important, highly covert, highly off-screen hacking. Also, in this one, Robert Redford can teleport.ĭylan (Breen) is a put-upon mega-man. It’s like All the President’s Men, if it ended with a montage of everyone involved with Watergate killing themselves, one after the other, after explaining to the camera that they messed up and want to die. It’s like The Room, in that it’s all sprung fully-formed from the forehead of one eccentric Zeus, and in that you have no idea what’s going to happen from scene to scene. Fateful Findings is an ethereal, uncanny blend of a mystical Chosen One fable, a romantic melodrama and a political thriller. But Breen does it all so singularly that he can’t help but be an auteur-unknowable, yet instantly recognizable.īreen makes movies that involve, as our resident bad movie expert Jim Vorel explai ns, “the oft-nude director playing an ultra-competent ladies’ man fighting for some sort of cause…head-spinningly bad editing, exploited young actresses, a near-total lack of proper audio recording, totally transparent criticism of ‘the corporations’ and lines of dialogue repeated so many times that you start to wonder if you’re watching some kind of avant-garde experiment in audience provocation.”Īs Breen’s sixth movie, Cade: The Tortured Crossing, washes over those already calling themselves Real Human Breens, let me welcome you to his breakout endeavor. There are plenty of enjoyably awful vanity projects out there ( GetEven and Fatal Deviation are great places to start). It’s not just that Breen does everything himself. His work is so deeply strange that anything recognizable as human adds new insights into Jung’s collective unconscious. He’s not going to pretend to be “in on it.” He’s everything Wiseau was when he made The Room : Mysteriously wealthy, recklessly self-sufficient, thematically obsessive. Its legacy has none of the post-boom “it’s a comedy” retconning or Rocky Horror overkill that its creator has tried to capitalize on. Premiering a decade after The Room (and a decade ago), 2013’s Fateful Findings boasts everything that made Wiseau’s game-changer so irresistible. Rushmore of bad movies and find Neil Breen ’s Fateful Findings. But as it fades into self-awareness, aspiring bad-movie devotees should look right next to it on the Mt. The Room, Tommy Wiseau’s alien elegy for a wounded heart, was the entry point to this corner of bad movies for many. In this place, Icarus is a hero nobody remembers Daedalus’ successful flight. It’s a place of sublime sincerity, where misplaced ambition can find an appreciative audience, exhausted by mainstream complacency. When these stars align, failure alchemically morphs into success. Where earnestness has never even considered irony. Where creativity collides with absurdity. There’s a sweet spot where ineptitude meets ego. But a bad movie doesn’t transcend its badness, becoming so-bad-it’s-good, just by having a giddy little-kid premise-like a velociraptor pastor or a bed that eats people -or a complete inability to execute its vision. Some of the really bad ones, we sought out intentionally. Over the years, we at Paste have watched a lot of bad movies.
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